Reflected in Your Eyes

Destiny had never felt so much, all at once. She had no idea what to do about these strange...amazing sensations. The peak of a year's worth of learning new things: what it felt like to trust to the point of total abandon; to be told, "You're beautiful," and believe it; that she could look in someone's eyes, and, without ever hearing it, know he was proud of her, that he adored her; that she could make someone happy....that her dreams and talents weren't too big after all. And now this.

Destiny thought Brian might've reached out his hand underneath the picnic table, but she wasn't sure. Then he leaned forward, never taking his eyes off hers and she knew his hand was there, waiting. Heart thumping, she reached out her own hand. Ecstasy brimmed to overflowing the moment she felt that current spark at her fingertips and travel lightspeed through every nerve in her body. She smiled.

"What are you thinking?" Brian asked. Destiny's smile became sheepish.

"I can't believe you're holding my hand!" she said in an almost quiet sort of squeal. Ridiculous, sappy. Destiny couldn't care less. Brian chuckled.

"I held your hand on the bus, too," he pointed out, amused.

"I couldn't believe it then, either!" Destiny laughed.

Twilight deepened around them as they sat in silence, Destiny willing this moment to last forever.

"Look at me," Brian requested.

Until now, Destiny had almost solely stared at the table or her hands. But she had good reason -- these emotions...this state of being was so new and so powerful, she didn't trust herself to look into those blue eyes. She would probably do something currently inappropriate; like get up and walk around this picnic table and hug him for dear life, or kiss him...a couple of entirely too forward moves at this point and at this place for her to make. So, she sort of glanced up and back down, and shifted uncomfortably, her heart sinking as she realized Brian must be frustrated that she couldn't give him something so simple.

Look at him! Destiny ordered herself. Nothing. She just couldn't look up again, just continued drawing circles on his wrist with her index finger -- a habit they'd started on the bus. A silent communication.

Brian turned Destiny's hand over in his and stroked her palm, across the top near the base of her fingers, with his thumb. He smiled that half-smile she loved so much.

"You have calluses, too," he commented, referring back a couple days when Destiny had verbally noted this about his hands. Brian's comment now was endearing, not disgusted or put off by this fact. He wasn't upset at her, even though she couldn't look him in the eye, when she knew he really wanted her to. Destiny wasn't used to such...patience!

God, is this how much You love me?

At that moment, she knew four things: The love of God blew her mind -- if He loved her more than this young man sitting across from her...WOW! Secondly, that she wanted to love God right back, with all He made her capable of giving; thirdly, that she loved this wise, confident young man named Brian, like her elders had always said, "You'll know,"; and lastly, that he loved her right back. Such knowledge was so hard to swallow all at once!

"We should get back to the group, now," Brian said, in that half-hearted manner that said, "I'd rather stay here, but they'll be wondering where we are."

The moment ended, and Destiny knew there were obstacles ahead, but she and Brian walked back to the group together, and for now, that was enough. Besides, the memory of this night would never be forgotten.